One of the questions that I had a big problem with when I was applying to medical school (and college, and probably residency in a few years) was when people would ask me about role models of mine or people I admire.  I have to confess that there has never been any single REAL person who has possessed qualities that I admire but has not possessed any qualities that I did not approve of.  I don't like hero worship in general because most of the time, heroes are men (or women) too, and I don't think it's fair to expect them to be more than that.  For me that eliminates athletes, politicians, and celebrities even if they were the embodiment of everything I admire about humanity.  Then you start to get into historical or legendary figures (Washington, Lincoln, Buddha, the big JC, etc.), but once you've crossed that line you begin to admire the qualities that other people who knew them wanted you to admire, or in the latter case admire something that is beyond my capabilities to achieve.  I'm certainly not my own role model (plenty of room for improvement, and in such a state of constant change that I couldn't even pin me down if I were that conceited), so what does that leave?  Where is my model?  I think now that the answer to that question lies within the pages of my old friends, BOOKS.  Maybe that's even the reason that some people read and write-to find something that they might be missing in the everyday, imperfect world in which we live.  Well, back to work . . .

Well, another semester has come and gone.  Ending the semester doesn't matter so much anymore (classes don't respect the neat boundaries of the calendar), but it's still nice to have that mile marker.  Plus it's a great catch-up time.  I got to read Shogun (EXCELLENT book, by the way-I've actually gotten hooked on the whole historical fiction genre in the last year or so-I've read Pillars of the Earth, Aztec, and I, Claudius as well).  But don't worry, LOTR and Harry Potter were first and remain near and dear to my heart-in fact my entertainment strategy for the next semester is to re-read LOTR to keep myself from becoming overly engrossed in something new.  Large backfire potential, but hopefully it will work.

Next semester comes the latest in a long series of standardized tests-the USMLE step 1.  Yet another opportunity for Kaplan to soak people for hundreds of dollars-umm, I mean, provide a valuable service, I mean . . . Sorry Josh.  No, despite my slandering of Kaplan and numerous other test prep companies, I'm actually paying for some of their products this time.  It was a wrench, but I wanted those practice questions.  Not that this interests the general reading public, so I'll move on.

Going to Virginia tomorrow, and then out to LA after Christmas to escape from the cold.  Below zero is darn cold, I don't care how many layers you have on.  When the snot freezes in your nose as you inhale, you know it's cold.  But that's gross, so I'll move on.

Glad to hear that people are finishing, graduating, and getting jobs.  I'll eventually leave school and start working . . . nah, who am I kidding.  On the plus side, I've found that I really enjoy pediatrics (yay!!!).  After my first couple of rotations, I was beginning to despair about my career choice, but now I've had two good ones in a row (peds and psychiatry-perhaps a combination?).  Kids are a lot more fun than adults-adults get mad when you're goofy or odd, whereas for pediatrics it's pretty much a requirement.  Not to mention pediatricians are allowed bow ties :). 

One thing that has dismayed me about starting medical school is the lack of quality outdoor time.  Other than soccer games, I don't spend much time out of doors-weekends are crowded and I'm not a skier or skater, so that limits myw inter options.  One of my classmates is trying to get me to start cross country skiing with him-it might be fun there's a good trail starting about a block away from my house-but it takes a lot of coordination that I am deficient in.  It's kind of funny-we learned all these test for cerebellar function, measuring if they have a loss of coordination, and I'm pretty bad right now.  The other option is camping and hiking more often, which will be a possibility in grad school when my weekends are a little more flexible.  Anyone want to come up to MN and hike/backpack/canoe?

Anyway, merry christmas, happy holidays, seasons greetings, and a happy new year to everyone.  Hope all is well.

So, dermatology blows.  That's my deep thought after I haven't posted in like 6 months.  We've had a whirlwind tour of infectious diseases (parasites and helminths are very high on the ick factor) and have started our marathon pathophysiology/pharmacology/radiology block, the one where we're supposed to learn everything there is to know about human disease (not quite, but close).  We've also started spending half time in the clinic and this week I started derm.  They are obviously skilled, they serve a very necessary function (especially with our sun-obsessed culture), but I wouldn't do it in a million years.  Not for me.  Nope.  I'm just glad I don't have to pick for a while yet, because other than a few I've absolutely ruled out (derm, OB-GYN, opthamology), I have no clue.  Which is really okay, because I like this whole med school thing enough to stick around until the end. 

It really isn't a bad life-all I have to do is show up, learn as much as I can, and study at night.  Compared to some of the people I see in the clinic, or some of you who have joined the working world, it's a pretty cushy life.  I don't have a lot of money, but I'm not hungry or cold.  I don't have a ton of free time, but what I have I get to spend doing things I enjoy.  And I've gotten to meet a lot of really great people and will get to do something I love for my career.  I guess I'm saying life is good (watching over shoulder for the hammer blow of karma to smack me down).

In other news, I'm going to be best man at my sister's wedding, that'll be different.  Our class soccer team has had a much more successful season than our winless, tieless debut last year and could finish above .500 if we win on Sunday (uncertain b/c el capitan has tickets to the Vikings game).  And even though the A's didn't make the playoffs, I can still root for monsieurs Bagwell and Biggio to stick it to that twerp Ozzie Guillen. 

One thing that has bothered me is that I realized a couple of weeks ago that most of my volunteer stuff has gotten pushed to the wayside by class and the quest for spare minutes to relax-it's funny how something just kind of sneaks up on you like that.  I'll have to get back in the saddle somehow.  Anyway, independent study does not mean write a blog entry, so I'd better get going.